Yet…

I see you
And I see myself
I see a gap
And I feel insecure.

And I see your ideals
As well as all of your deals.
I feel my fears
Yet I try to conceal…

To conceal this dark side of me
So I dance along with you
We are too close
So I see what I’ve become.

I wish to be accepted
So I fly and dance
At the sound of your voice
At the rhythm of your song.

The thing is
Sometimes I wonder
Is this really me?
I do love to fly
I love to dance
I love your voice
The sound of your strings
I definitely love them all.

Yet…

Wicked (His Side) 12

***** Continuation *****

“Oh! What’s this?
Look who’s coming?” Said Rose

“Cut it out Rose
Where is she?”

I wanted
To rip her apart
If it wasn’t for that
Dragon lover of hers.

It’s been two years
I’ve searched for Leia everywhere
Except
Rose’s territory…
Texas.

I need her permission
Since
She’s the current alpha.
Her
Being a Nahual
And that dragon lover of hers
A lethal combination
Against us
Vampires.

“I gave you my advice Mat
It’s late now
Let her be
Give her another year
Let her breathe.
She’s under my care
I promised her a peaceful life
At least until the spell wears off.
She still has another 3 years
So she’s safe
And unconsciously
She doesn’t even have eyes
For other guys
I honestly don’t know
If she is stubborn
Or just too loyal.
Anyways
She will graduate
In another year.
I’ll give you a chance
To enter my land
And settle for two years.
Only then
Can you break the spell.”

She’s talking as if
She doesn’t see…
I’m burning inside
Yet she keeps smirking
Knowing I have no say in this.

But still…

“Give me proof
A picture
At least once a week.”

“What?
Mat
Are you insane?”

“Rose
It’s been two years
My heart has been
In constant turmoil
Please”

She sighed
“Ok but remember
It’s your choice
If you want the same outcome.
You see
Her life is not decided by you
But by her.
You want her?
Court her
Love her
Make her fall for you so bad
That even when the spell is broken
She’ll still stays by your side…
Anyways
Come back in a year
And don’t disappoint me.”

She left
Leaving me with a sour mouth.
At least Leia is alive
And I will be able to see her
In a year’s time…

This little doll

By RR SuperNova

A broken doll
I have at my home
It’s quite old
Yet precious
Unique and bold.

She looks fine
When given a glance.
Her eyes have become unique
Compared to today’s
Doll features at the mall.

One can tell
Her faint smile has passed
Through decades of soaked experiences
As well as bright sunny days.

She seems rough to the touch
Yet she’s soft and fragile
Like any other doll.

There is only one thing
That stings this poor doll
A broken record inside her soul.
She’s not able to express herself.
Only broken words come out as her sound.

I’ve thought of replacing her device
But then again
That would change
Her all.

You see
She’s got the loveliest
Of songs
Unique to her all.

So I’ve decided
To pull out that old rusty disc
Polish it
Fix some of the bumps
And also replace
Some of the broken strings.

It’s a big hassle
But it’s well worth it.
To give some love
To that
Which has been forgotten.

After finishing
Putting everything in place
I wound it up
It was just that perfect place.

I could almost hear the words
“Your faith was strong
But you needed proof”…
I felt the string
Resonating with my heart
It’s true
I have felt like that
I guess it’s my curiosity
Always getting the best of me.
I watched my classic doll
All fixed up
As I was hearing the song
And then
That part
That brings redemption
Into my soul
“There is a blaze of light
In every word
It doesn’t matter
Which you heard
The holy or the broken
Hallelujah”…

Just a beautiful song
Coming from my quite
Unique
And lovely doll.

I guess
It’s like advice given
From my grandparents
Who I’ve never known.

Dirty House

By Rosalva Ruiz (SuperNova)

Is it the lack of will?
As I take part of the couch
I see the kids running
Screaming
Throwing legos around.

My head throbs
Poisonous cheers
Thorns prickling
My already wounded mind.
Bombs echoing my soul.

I take a look outside
The palms dance
With the beat of the wind.
Like two lovers embracing
Acknowledging each other’s presence.
Bodies entangled
And moving with ease
Circling with poise
What a beautiful sight.
My heart aches
Don’t know yet
If it’s by the lovely sight
Or the rumbling inside.

Teachers bleed their knowledge
I tell my kids “eyes on-screen.”
After a while
They get annoyed
And start hacking the system.
Two screens are shown
One with the teacher
The other
A youtuber it seems.

They forget
I know they do
So I become
That security guard
That unpleasant person
That keeps them on a leash.
I try my best to block
Their indifference
Sometimes
To the point of defiance.
My throat hurts
My heart aches
I block my tears.
They seem startled
For the moment
And back down temporarily.

I see my house being unattended
I keep feeling the urge
Yet they keep looking for an opportunity.
So I sit in this lousy couch
Like a watcher
Feeling insecure
Feeling the pressure
Trying to stop
Screams of joy
So the scholars pay attention.

This feeling of loneliness
This feeling…

I avert my gaze to the window
Once again
I see
Those dancing partners
I’m starting to envy them
Such lovely freedom.

I guess it’s finally getting me

This isolation

This impotence when it comes
To the school’s electronic devices.

The attention I give
To three different grade levels.

At the same time making
Food for them.

Trying to stop words
Coming out from their mouths
I have never said
In front of them.

All thanks to youtube
Thanks to the lack of admins permission
On the school’s electronic device.

Then again
grateful for this device
During these troubling times.

The pressure of them
Making a B or better.

It’s all scrambled eggs
Including the eggshells
They keep hurting
every time I chew and swallow.

I guess
Just like a dirty house
That needs to be cleaned
My soul
Also needs to be cleansed.

Words From Within

By Rosalva Ruiz (SuperNova)

I wouldn’t say
It’s a poem per say
It’s an out cry
From inside
Bleeding lines
Looking for a healing tonic
To induce an unfinished scar
While praying this pain
Is but another past
Another world
I can cast aside
Another reality
Written in paper
With this humble hand
Deliberating
If I should also
give it breath
Or just burn it
As if a secret mission
Never to be known.

Raw honey
That smoothens
My rough throat
Untying this knot
Giving reign
To this voice
To this pen
To this written page.

Glass like tears
Melted
Purified water
To be drank again
And again
Until others knots
Are untied as well.

Raw words
Not beautified
Just outlined
A beginning to an end
And end to begin
That is all…

Shut Eyes

By Rosalva Ruiz (SuperNova)

I guess I knew
But I shut my eyes
I’ve imagined every excuse
You could think of
But never the color
Never the heritage
Never the roots of it all.

Thinking back
There was a time
When I lived at a small town
I was but seven
And fascinated with magic
Funny enough
A family of five
Came into town.

They were witches
The grownups said
They might put a spell on ya
They said and with that
Voiced barriers were made.

But I wanted to learn magic
Due to circumstances
I wanted to cast a spell
And protect myself.
I wanted to be invisible
To the masked people.
So either I died trying
Or never be able to.

And yes
A magic spell was cast
“Friendship”
The most beautiful there was.
I learned so many things
But never magic.
Sometimes
I was invisible to some people
Since they thought
I was stained
Which didn’t really matter
Since I was having other
Much more troubling affairs
At that time.

I once asked them
Why is everyone saying
You all are witches and yet
You all don’t know any magic?
Antonio’s mom answered
With a pained smile
“Well, it just came to be that way.”
I couldn’t understand why
She answered that way.

In fact I couldn’t understand
How his dad was always
Looking for a job
He often was fired
After a week or two of getting hired.

He was a loving father
He never drank
I never saw him raise his voice
He could do just about anything.
In my eyes, he was such a good guy
I just couldn’t understand it.

After a year
They left town
I never saw them again.

I didn’t get it back then
They were having a hard time coping
Getting acknowledged despite their looks
They barely had money for food
Yet they always invited me
To whatever they had in the table.

Why was I so naive back then?
Why didn’t I see the injustice?
Why did I shut my eyes?

Strand

There was no God
To be spoken to…

Broken

No miracle
No magic casted…

Broken

Just one strand
That one freaking strand
I hung to…

Clung

No matter how beaten…

Desperately

No matter how deep into soil…

Brazenly

Even when crumbled…

I clung

Clung to that
one shining strand…

And I

Depended of
That one and only…

Sanity

Today is a broken day…

Faith

Yet tomorrow will be
another page…

Yes

This one insignificant strand…

Sanity combined with faith.