Is This Really Goodbye?

What exactly am I looking for
In those crispy eyes?
A bit of your soul?
A reflection of my own?
But all I see is
Emptiness
Disgust
Not even
a hint of remorse..

And I…
I gave you
Everything
My time
My mind
My heart
I gave you my all
Without contemplating
My soul.

Yet all I see
Are those crispy eyes.
Not even a smile
Just an empty carcass
No love, no sentiment
Nothing
Is this really goodbye?

Sudden goodbye

By Rosalva Ruiz (SuperNova)

I guess…
When it comes to the sudden goodbyes
It’s not the goodbye
but the regrets
That come along with it
And pierce my peaceful mind.

Like the dreams
That are forever gone
From the cub in transition.
Like the heroic moment
that stabs you from behind.
The life saved from the fallen
From the unwanted
from the feared
From the egoistic and uncivilized
Exchanged with the bullet taken
By your mind literally and consciously.

Like the understanding
Of people standing
Watching
Unmoving
Frozen in fear.
Yet why?
Why did you move?..
Why is it that the heroes
Always die?
Why is it that the brave
The caring
The explosive compassion
Is always extinguished first?

Chained in bed…
That is…
Another part of my regret.
Your last goodbye
A parade with a serenade.
People following
They sang along
They walked with you
And others were waiting ahead.
Some just watching
And not knowing
Others with a hand
In their heart
For bravery is in front
Passing in silence
With “Un día a la vez”
And us with a knot
In our throat.

This was the last goodbye…
Yet
I wasn’t there
That alone…

Forbidden Path

A Forbidden path
She took in her past

A drunken dog
Is barking at her door
After not finding the keyhole
Howling
came from the freaking wolf.

Pity
the neighbors felt
After a few months of separation
An empty house
Is now making noise
He is now outside his home
While the girl
Doesn’t open her door

But they don’t know
Today was a day of reconciliation
He is celebrating, I suppose…

But not for her
Today was the first day
Of their last chance.

Today marked their reunion
Today was a new beginning
Forgetting his past adventures
His grotesque words
Even his lack of responsibility.

She tried not to step
On the forbidden path.
She did her best
To be against all odds.

Her aunts, her friends
They all were against divorce.
That forbidden path
Too uncanny for this girl.

She’s portrayed as cold blooded
With almost no loving.
House wrecker
And soul sucking…

As for her
A darken veil of hypocrisy
Is all she sees
Hatred for the adventurer
Disappointment from the sweet talker.

Divroce is all she thinks
Forbiden path it appears
She doesn’t care
Loosing all kinds of friends
Freedom is what she seeks
Peace away from that mess.

She opens that door
While carrying her son
With a suitcase on her back
Today was the last chance
This is goodbye
Carry on forbidden path.

Nameless love

You are bound to be free
and that is how
I will let you be
This silence is my love.
This smile is my farewell.
I can not say
You are my first love
Yet you are the one
That hurt the most.
The moon is clear tonight
The waves are ready
To sail away.
The treasures are left
Forever to be lost
And the wind
Has set its course.
Pretty sure you will
Set foot in many ports
As for mine
Is for ever closed.
Goodbye
My nameless love.

Finally free

As she was saying goodbye
The car kept moving
Her eyes kept drifting
To the past memories
The knot in her throat
Asphyxiated her soul
Barely twelve
And she’s set her goal.

“It’s finally here,
I’ve waited for twelve years
I’m finally free!
Free from him
Free from them
Free from those shackles.”

Tears ran down her face
As if shedding her fears
Leaving behind that fake
And dark world.

“My body
finally belongs to me
Not another day
Will I have to say ok
I’m finally…”

She closed her wet honey eyes
And knocked her head on the window
As if knocking monsters away.
Sighed, cleaned her face
And with determination
Faced her future ahead.

Today

My head is nowhere to be found
My heart is deep in the dark
Probably even beyond that.

Today marks the day
That you left me behind in dismay
Today is that day
In which I left that rope sail away.
Yes, today my heart is sizzling
With salty invisible bubbles.

Even though tomorrow
will be just a wave
Today the density of it
Is purely asphyxiating as hell.

Tomorrow will be of the past
Yet today my heart
Has been shred into dust.
Today part of my body
Has been turned black
Today part of my blood
Has dried to the core.
Yes, today I lost
Yes, today I burst
Whats, hows, whys, whens
They seem too surreal
To me now.

Yes, I turn my back
to that part of me
To that sizzling fire
To that freaking chaos
To that insecurity
To that part of my heart
That made me shed
trillions of tears.

Yes, I have lost myself
Yes, I have lost that part as well
Nothing will be the same
Nothing at all
Nothing….

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